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Followers

"Everybody has a secret world inside of them. All of the people of the world, I mean everybody. No matter how dull and boring they are on the outside, inside them they've all got unimaginable, magnificent, wonderful, stupid, amazing worlds. Not just one world. Hundreds of them. Thousands maybe" ~ Neil Gaiman (A Game of You)

4.22.2011

The Spat

I paced the living room floor, periodically peering out the window, watching the black turn to a lightening gray. Still, the Easter Bunny hadn't arrived. The kids would be up soon, spilling in with sleepy excitement, looking for their baskets. Dang, even if he got there soon, I wouldn't have enough time to hide the baskets.

I knew the Easter Bunny didn't have a magic sleigh like Santa to carry him from house to house in the blink of an eye. Instead, he relied on the sheer volume of his family to get the job done. Maybe our house had been delegated to one of the young uns. They were cute and shy, but sometimes they got lost. But I'd never had to wait this long before.

I heard a sound and whirled around. The Easter Bunny himself stood before me, looking haggard and apologetic.

"Dude, what happened?" I asked. "The sun is almost up."

"I know, I'm sorry.” He handed me the baskets in his hand. “It's just that last fall, I forgot my wife's birthday..."

I shrugged and looked at him quizzically. "That happens..."

"and went to a bar with the guys instead..." he continued. I winced.

"I guess I kissed a waitress and got lipstick in my fur..."

By this time I was shaking my head, knowing the story couldn't end well.

"and didn't get home until after three."

I cupped my balls protectively.

"Ouch." I patted him on the shoulder sympathetically. "So she..."

"Cut me off. No sex for a month."

I shook my head in pity, then furrowed my brow.

"But that was last fall." I did the math in my head, understanding finally dawning on me.

"Yep. That's why we're short-handed this year."

*****
Today's prompt:  Why was Easter Bunny held up with deliveries this year?

To play along, visit Write Anything's [Fiction] Friday here.

9 comments:

Mauvekat said...

Poor Easter Bunny, being cut off for a month. Interesting take on the bunny being late.

Sarah Allen said...

Great work! And I ADORE the Neil Gaiman quote :) Thanks for sharing!

Sarah Allen
(my creative writing blog)

Shelli said...

Thank you, Mauve and Sarah! And nice to meet you.

Laura Meyer said...

Love it! I totally felt sorry for EB :) Nice take on it and it's quite well linked to mine!

Donna Weaver said...

*gigglesnort*

Oh, my!

Shelli said...

Laura -- I noticed we were on the same wave length!

Donna -- Yours is my favorite response. :)

Cathryn Grant said...

That's hilarious. I love the idea of the Easter Bunny using the sheer volume of his family to meet his obligations.

Happy Easter!

Shelli said...

Cathryn, thanks. And really, it's the only logical explanation.

Anonymous said...

The falling out of lovers is the renewing of love.